What a day! Day 2 Fri 15th Aug 1997

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I woke up at 4.15 in the morning with the sun was just tipping the horizon at 4.40. My anxiety was also making an appearance. At first Derek and I found it difficult to decide where to go, who to phone and how to go about ‘it’. The indecision made me irritable. A storm was brewing between us. Derek is much more spontaneous than I am. At this point in my life I like to feel in control. Organization is control. I was panicking about the lack of clarity. As you know I had chosen many different things to do and look at. So together we decided that I would give the list to Derek, as he is much more level-headed, and he would pick from the list and make a plan. We had planned to leave the house at 9 am but instead we only left at 11 am. I had to concede that in the end taking the time was worth it.

Derek was amazing. He said, ‘it’s a surprise. Just sit back and relax’! It was good for me to let go and not be in charge for a while. I had fun not knowing where we were going. He seemed to enjoy being in charge and took to the travel system like a duck to water. We found our way, after changing junctions, to Victoria station. It was quite a challenge for us as in South Africa we have not experienced such a sophisticated train system. We went and bought a travel pass which entitles you to travel anywhere by bus or train the whole day. We had a zone 1-3 pass.

Derek was a star,

Taking us through the streets of London,

As if we’d been living there forever.

We saw gardens

We ate samosas and tuna pizza.

Found Hyde Park with speakers corner,

Marble arch,

Madame Tussaud’s,

And the planetarium.

Ate Hagen-Daze ice-creams,

Saw Lester square –

There were people, people, and more people everywhere! : Very vi-bey.

Now I know how you felt about people: 5 people on the beach were too many!

We travelled from Piccadilly Circus station to Water Loo and back home. Very tired. But worth it!

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What do I notice about myself? More laughter and a strange dredging of feelings: a familiar feeling an old happiness and contentment. I feel more relaxed than ever before. I also feel like I’m falling in love with everything around me and Derek too. Emotions ripple to the surface in a good way. Derek and I are having fun. I feel like happiness is everywhere.

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Three days to Scotland!

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